Bridges for Youth

Admiration, respect and honor are not responses that you want to count on drawing your strength from  or depend on, when you are working with at-risk kids.   Yesterday, I walked into a Bridges center to announce that a former pro football player was coming to visit the next day.  You would think the kids would be excited and pay close attention, but that was not the case.   The noise level and chatter rose to a level were they could no longer hear anything I was saying.  If the kids had tomatoes and rotten fruit, I felt like they would probably be throwing them at me.  It felt like I had just told them that summer vacation was cancelled, that there would be no recess, or that we were taking all their youth center games away.  No, I was telling  them some really cool news, a former pro football player was coming to visit.  The whole encounter lasted about 30 seconds and I walked out with my head down, my feelings  hurt and in disbelief at the unexpected response.

There is no one among the staff at Bridges For Youth who has not experienced the hurt feeling dilemna of youth ministry. This is undoubtedly the reason that statistics show that youth workers often experience burnout very early on, and are not able to stay the course for very long. As Christian staff we trust in God to fuel our journey, and we believe that you have to consistently turn to God, so that you can weather the storm.

Being alone in a youth center with even a couple of kids is a recipe for getting your feelings hurt. In 1998 and 1999, I was in just such a situation as the lone staff member at the National Bridges For Youth center.   The number of kids wasn’t overwhelming at the time, as I often had only two of three kids that I would be shepherding. It was a time when God was educating me about at risk kids and I was learning on the job. Save the presence of God I would have perished back then and  my existence and mission would have faded into oblivion. 

The two or three kids in attendance back then would divide and conquer Pastor Steve. While I was attending to one’s needs another would turn all the lights out at the breaker box-that’s why it has a lock on it to this day. They would circle the building, going out the front door and coming through the back.  Frequently they would be annoyed by my attempts to control them and they would leave stating, “They would never come back again!”.   In a short time they would return, smiles on their faces, with another clever childish prank to play on me-that is why kids are not allowed to leave and return the same day anymore.  Basically, my feelings were getting hurt right and left just about eight years ago.   It was  staying on the front lines and coming back day after day that eventually showed the kids that I loved and cared about them.

One particular incident at National stands out, that left me feeling particularly upset. We had a small snack bar at the Bridges center with candy bars and a variety of candy. Two of the kids devised a plan, distracted me and took the snack bar money. I discovered the money was missing but certainly couldn’t prove who took it. The incident left me shaking my head and I felt like someone had just beaten me for no apparent reason. The next two days at the youth center my enthusiasm had waned and my disappointment showed. God renewed me on the third day after the incident, when two boys came to the front door, handed me the money they had stolen and expresed their heartfelt apologies. I still remember the sincere expression on the boys faces, and the remorse for what they had done.

As I verse the memories of my feelings getting hurt there are a flood of memories. Putting yourself in the uncomfortable position of getting your feelings hurt seems to be the inevitable price to have victory in dealing with kids and in building nurturing relationships. God is in control!

“And let us not grow weary in doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. Therefore, as we have opportunity let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith.” Galatians 6:9-10

Pastor Steve  (When I am weak, then I am strong)

I met Bob in 1999 at the Bridges For Youth center on National.  He was one of the first adults I encountered in ministry there.  There were no kids at the center when Bob came through the front door, and I still to this day think this all happened so I could be attentive to his needs.

While listening to Bob, I quickly gathered that he missed his father who had passed away some years ago and that he had a difficult time understanding his mother and her ways.   He talked about the days when he had a sign business and it was obvious he really missed it.   A musical career and a touch of elusive success in a band, was something Bob spoke of with excitement.   A song he had written was used without permission and without compensation.  Bob had traveled around and seen much of the country, and he had colorful stories about his adventures.  He wore a smile and also donned that disgusted look when you talked about something that bothered him.  Bob’s clothes weren’t the best, and he had a mountain man look about him.  There was a profound interest in Bob to share his testimony in front of churches, but none that I know of ever allowed it.  This bothered him immensely.  Almost every month Bob would get some assistance money so he would be able to eat, but he gave most of the money to homeless men and women he would cross paths with, so they could eat.  He worried that the wrong people would find out he was helping others and take away the assistance.  Feeling his passion for music and knowing that he didn’t have a guitar, I bought one for the youth center and allowed him to come and play.  Several times we allowed Bob to take the guitar and use his musical talents on South Street in Springfield.   I remember going to watch him perform on the streets and how much I enjoyed this man.  He could really play that guitar.  Bob was always wanting to help at the youth centers in what ever way he could.   I don’t know how many times he did face painting, but it was a bunch.  He free hand painted Bridges For Youth above the snack bar at Nichols Street in 2001 and he painted a bridge and Welcome to Bridges at the front door. Most of all he was a good friend and someone I dearly miss.  You see, Bob was a homeless man, and one who was accustomed to that lifestyle.   I accepted him as  a colorful man and one who was honest and sincere.   I count myself blessed that I knew him and that he shared his life with me.    In honor of Bob,   Pastor Steve

I find the concept of doing a blog to be very exciting. It will be interesting to see the response to the inner workings of the house painter/pastor’s mind.

Lets kick this off by talking about Steve Hare, the house painter. I never get to far from this part of my identity. Those who know me will usually see me at the office, at the store, and even checking out the youth centers in my painting clothes and cap.

Technically, and in the truest sense of the word, I work more than full time hours at Bridges For Youth. The reality is that often there is not enough money from week to week to pay the bills and the staff, so I get some of God’s provision for my family by painting now and then.

I found hope in Jesus back in 1993, when things were looking particularly bleak for my family and me. At the time I was working four jobs to support Kathryn and the four kids. Even with the four jobs I still couldn’t make ends meet. I was beginning to think nothing I could ever do would be enough.

It was in 1993 while I was delivering newspapers in the early morning that I came across the hope of Jesus on Christian radio. Hope is what I needed, and hope is what I found when I accepted Christ as my Savior at the age of 36. I frequently laugh about how God has called a painter to bring hope to kids. I just love how God brings hope to hurting kids and their parents.

God bless you all,

Pastor Steve Hare