Archive for the ‘child abuse’ Category

Child abuse and neglect come home

Friday, April 18th, 2008

This is child abuse awareness month and probably just about everybody has heard that Greene county has a big problem in this area.   I believe the statistic is 62 out of 1000 in Greene county are victims of child abuse and neglect.  I’m sure anybody who hears this has to be appalled.  There are like 23,000 students just in the Springfield Public school system alone, so thats about 1400 kids impacted right there.  This doesn’t even include all the kids that are not school age.  I heard on a radio talk show today that a large segment of the child abuse and neglect reports are for kids ages 6 and under, so this is a mountain of a problem.  Kids are crying out for help, but who will hear them if there is no one around they feel they can trust to report it to. 

Child abuse and neglect are difficult to deal with, especially when you are on the frontlines. We are in a place that we have voluntarily put ourselves, because we are passionate about helping kids and their families.  Compassion and involvement in the needs and hurts of kids illuminates the need for caring intervention through reporting, and paves the way to restored relationships and stronger families.  For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. 

I say often that the Bridges For Youth Centers are on the front lines and in the trenches as we work with kids.   This year alone we are serving 969 registered kids, ages 6-18. These types of numbers always reminds me of the fishes and loaves incident in the Bible.  Two loaves of bread and five fish to feed 5000.  Bridges is on the front lines with our 2 loaves and 5 fish, trusting in God and standing amazed at how He provides to fill the needs of kids, day after day. It should be no surprise that a large segment of these kids are victims of child abuse and neglect.   We have had dozens of  instances down through the years when rape, neglect, physical abuse have been shared with us by kids.   It never gets easier to deal with, and it always leaves a sick feeling in your gut.  Sin is like that. The sin really does make you feel sicker when its close to home though.  Child abuse and neglect is present right among the kids you want to love and protect. Its the kid you played pool with or watched a movie with just last week.  Or its the kids who proudly told you they memorized the Bible verse today. And many times its the kids who has suddenly changed due to abuse. All of a sudden the childish prankster is gone and it seems as though someone has stolen their soul.

There are a few in the Springfield and Marshfield communities who know the value of having the Bridges for Youth centers and our caring staff available to kids. Our prayer is that more people will discover us and understand that we need and value their support.

 I love pictures of Jesus surrounded by children, because that is real to me. Now, we must be Christ like and surround ourselves with children we can embrace and love through the pains of child abuse, neglect, and poverty.

Pastor Steve Hare

Surrendering Billy and Susan’s Needs

Monday, April 7th, 2008

Something has always seemed strange to me as a Pastor.  There are a quantity and diversity of needs that Billy and Susan present as you encounter them each day at a Bridges for Youth center.   Approaching these needs as a caring adult, you want to fix and repair all the needs.   Jesus would not be wanting any of these little ones to suffer and neither did we. Anyhow, in the midst of all the problems that kids carry with them, we discover it is impossible  to check very many of their needs off of a list.

Billy is eight years old and has a voice that is like a roaring lion. His voice never lowers but resounds with a thundering quality that demands attention.   It takes a great deal of patience to communicate with Billy without getting into a shouting match.  There is no argument here between the adult mentor and Billy, only  an intensive encounter so that Billy can determine how far you are willing to go in reaching out to him.    Billy is wondering, “Is this adult just like all the others?”, and “Will he abandon me also?, just like all the other adults in my life.” Fatigue starts to show on the adult mentor, but strangely, to Billy anyway, this adult is strangely staying the course. Billy will not admit it until months later, but this adult mentor has become a strong influence and encouragement in his life.   Problems and challenges that Billy faced were constantly being communicated to staff, and it had occurred to Billy more than once that they were like family to him.   Billy had problems and needs that staff were able to remedy almost immediately by having a nurturing relationship with him, and then there were those other problems that had to be surrendered to God.   Not unlike hundreds of other kids in the area, Billy’s father was not a part of his life, and he was being raised by his mother.    Billy had a great mom, but she couldn’t replace the abandonment and hurt of a dad who apparently wanted nothing to do with Billy or his two sisters. Few worked harder than Billy’s mom to provide, but often it just wasn’t enough and the utilities would be cut off or they would get way behind on rent. As adult mentors and Christians we discover that we help in these situations by surrendering the impossible to God, and then we watch as God responds to our cries for help.

Susan was so quiet and shy when we met her that it took a lot of  time to get her to open up. A 12 year old, Susan had what I would say was a very difficult life. You could see in her eyes what she was thinking as she looked into the adult mentors eyes, “Can I trust this person with my hurt?”. It would be two months later before Susan had the confidence to share, and then the trust and healing started to show after that. There were some very hard truths that were hidden in the recesses of Susan’s heart.    The recurring thoughts of worthlessness were triggered by rememberances of an abusive father who was no longer in her life.  The undignified assault on her was enlarged by a mother who did not care about her and who was in jail for drug use. Susan was now living with a relative, and was the only option outside of foster care. Her visits to the youth center and talks with the adult mentor became cherished moments in her day.   Susan had a chance to dialogue with a favorite staff member about the days events, and the love that she received would give her renewed hope.  Always greeted with a hug when she arrived, Susan had a sense that these people were like Jesus to her.  Susan would become talkative and comfortable at Bridges after a few months. Susan’s  severed relationships with both her mom and dad continued to stir hurtful feelings. The harsh  reality of what had happened to Susan were not lost in the daily conversations with Bridges staff. Impossible for a human to fix or repair we surrender Susan’s troubles to God.   God will be attentive to Susan’s cries for healing and there will be a victory.

These above are not real kids, but real problems that the kids we see deal with each day.    The stories are a reflection of how a simple little youth center with a loving, caring staff can make a positive impact on kids.  All this, not through our own strength, but through a surrendering to God and His omnipotence and love for His children.

 Pastor Steve Hare